Postcards
by VegaKeep
Summary: AU where Xander's life gets a bit confusing when someone pushes their way in.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: Nothing owned by me, but we could make a deal…  
  
Note: Inspired by an animai I saw. The out of blue marriage is from the animai but everything else is of my design (with some special help).   
  
Spoilers: AU written by me so any kind of surprises are possible.  
  
Postcards  
VegaKeep  
  
  
She stood before them like as if she was on trial, then remembered that she was on trial.  
  
"What have I done?" she yelled at them, but silence and the occasional cold stare was her answer.  
"Great, I'm being judged by my parents" the woman muttered. She had dark brown hair and deep brown eyes. She wore mountain climbing gear and her trademark Colt Single Action Army. But she knew that trying flight with a smoking gun was stupid considering her position.  
  
"For what reason have you come here?" one her judges finally said. "Do you not know that your life is forfeit now?" he said as if with a heavy heart.  
  
"During my travels, I have come across things that can not be explained, and I seek answers."  
  
"What are your questions?"  
  
"Why have you cut all ties to the outside world? Can you not see that you could make it into a better place?"  
  
"Why should we?" another of her judges answered. "Man has proven to us that they are not worthy of guidance."  
  
"The only guidance they serve is that of War," another said, her disgust noted. She wore a pink gown, and had golden blonde hair. She looked over at the judge who had originally addressed her.  
  
Placing his hand over that of the disgusted judge, the judge said, "I hope that we've answered your question. Now prepare yourself for oblivion" he said rising from his seat. But to the judge's surprise, the woman showed no fear. She instead set her pack down and began to rummage through it until she finally pulled out an object. She looked at it then pulled it closer holding it to her heart as the judge raised his hand, a battle-axe in his hand. Before the judge could loose his weapon, he stopped, sensing something coming from the object. His hand wavered and he lowered his weapon and let it drop, a loud clang sound emitting through the chamber.   
  
"What is that you hold?" he asked.  
  
The adventurer and the female judge both looked at the judge. The adventurer then walked to the head judge and handed him the object. The judge looked it over, placing his hand over the object and closed his eyes. The female judge looked over at the adventurer, then at the object.  
  
It was a photograph. A photograph of a young man who had dark brown hair and chocolate eyes. He appeared to be thirteen and the head judge's eyes were filled with sorrow, then changed to joy. "Perhaps I was a bit hasty in my sentence adventurer. Perhaps we can come to a compromise." 


	2. The Meeting

Alexander Harris was walking home from school with his best friend Willow and her boyfriend, Oz. Xander and Willow had been best friends since childhood, ever since their first brawl over who would use the slide first. They were only five at the time but the tomboy had been so impressed with Xander's spirit that day that they became fast friends since. Even though Willow had a boyfriend, she paid a lot more attention to Xander. But the shorter young man didn't feel jealousy towards them. He knew that Xander was her friend. Besides, it was good for him to have a friend that got along with his girlfriend, and he enjoyed helping Willow give Xander advice. Even if half of it was ridiculous. But right now he was getting tired of this one, as was Willow. Him and Willow were gung-ho on celebrating their year anniversary, but were unable to convince Xander to bring a date.   
  
"Look guys, I know you mean well but I don't want to complicate things by bringing along something as unstable as a girl" Xander replied.   
  
Willow gave out an exasperated "OOOH", then whacked Xander on the back of his head.  
  
"HEY WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?" Xander yelled while rubbing the back of his head.  
  
"You needed it. It's been a year already and you shouldn't judge the opposite sex based on your experiences with Buffy. I've told you once, I've told you two hundred times with this one being the two hundredth and first, the bitch didn't deserve a nice guy like you. She's the one who cheated on you with Angel. She's the one who's crying over how he's treating her."  
  
"Thus my case that women are unstable. They whine about not being able to find a nice guy, but at the same time turn down or in my case dump the nice guy for the dangerous type. Look Willow I don't want to seem like a party pooper but the two of you should go out and have a good time. I'd just be the third wheel."  
  
"Xander.."  
  
"Willow, it's okay. Besides, who'd want to go out with me?" Willow was about to answer that maybe her friend Amy might but then decided not to. He was right. Ever since Buffy, Xander had built a wall around himself, refusing to let anyone in. They continued walking home.  
  
When they reached Xander's house, he waved goodbye to his friends and walked to his door. Willow prayed that Xander would find some from of peace. When he was dating Buffy, he was so full of life. A girlfriend is what he needed considering his home life. His mom had walked out on him when he was seven, his father was an alcoholic, and his step-mom didn't even acknowledge him. Xander pretty much had to do all the work around the house. It seemed like he would wind up becoming like a slave and she felt he deserved better. He needed someone that would appreciate him. She wanted him to come with them and actually relax, even enjoy himself for once but the one thing that not even her knuckles could fix was Xander's mind once he set his mind to something. Her and Oz continued walking down the sidewalk to their homes, where they would later meet at the Bronze and dance the night away for their anniversary, not knowing that Xander had arranged something special for them.   
  
As soon as Oz and Willow had turned the corner, a beautiful blonde with curly hair appeared from the other corner. She wore a tight blue designer dress that accentuated her curves and black open toe heels. She was a literal knockout, and a passing motorist who turned his head to continue looking at her wound up sideswiping another car whose driver was also staring at the girl.   
  
Despite the loud accident the girl was oblivious to what had happened around her, her mind set on something much more important. She came to a stop in front of a house and looked at the mailbox. Seeing the house number the girls eyes brightened and she walked up to door smiling. She reached for and rang the doorbell, impatient while at the same time struggling to contain her emotions.  
  
When the door finally opened it was by a dark haired young man with brown eyes. His reaction at seeing a beautiful well-dressed and very curvaceous girl was the favorite "ahhhh." The girl's eyes widened at seeing him and her mouth opened to comment on his reaction yet no sound came out as she took in every bit of him.  
  
"Uh...Err…Um can I help you?" the resident asked trying to recover from the shock of seeing the most beautiful girl he ever saw.  
  
"Are you Alexander Harris?' the girl asked in a friendly tone, a voice in her head pleading for this attractive young man to be him.  
  
"I am" he responded finally getting himself under control. "Can I ask what this is about?" It wasn't everyday that a beautiful girl knocked on his door looking for him. Another thing that ran in his mind was a small voice was that ALL girls were nothing but trouble.  
  
Smiling the girl walked closer to Xander who started to cringe a little at her approach. They were now face to face and the girl wrapped her arms around his neck, then brought her head closer to his and began to kiss him deeply, closing her eyes as she savored the taste of his lips. Xander was deeply enraptured by the moment but then regained his senses and was about to break up the kiss when the girl broke it off. Smiling at him with her arms still snaked around his neck she sighed then said "By the power invested in me by my mother, you've just become my husband."  
  
"WHAT? I'M YOUR HUSBAND!? Wait a minute, who are you?"  
  
"I'm your wife silly," she said lightly giggling. "My name is Glory," she said a little weakly before she collapsed in Xander's arms from fainting. She had no idea that a kiss would be so wonderful, especially a human's.  
  
~*~*~*  
Well, what do you think? Didn't expect that ship did ya? 


	3. The Deal

Even though Xander believed women to be completely unstable, that didn't mean he would just leave one in distress. He carried the beautiful but obviously mad girl's limp body into the house and into his room. As he gently he placed her on top of his bed, he took Glory's purse and placed it on his nightstand. Xander then undid the straps of the blonde's heels to remove them then pulled back his bed covers. Carefully he lifted up the girl who claimed to be his wife and placed her on the bed again and covered her with the warm sheets.  
  
As Xander switched off the lights he heard Glory murmur out as she slept "is he really as kind as you say he is daddy?"   
  
'This keeps getting stranger by the minute' he thought. Xander reached for the light switch when he heard her lightly sob "How can someone that is so kind endure so much pain?"   
  
This last bit caught Xander by surprise and as a result he collided with the nightstand and knocked it over causing the purse to fall onto the floor, spilling its contents. Xander mentally berated himself and began to gather up all of Glory's things when his eyes fell on videotape and a photograph. He looked at the photo first. It was of him, taken three years ago. How had she been able to get a hold of this one?   
  
He next looked at the videotape and was curious. Why would she have a videotape? Against hearing the voice that told him no, Xander took the videotape with him as he exited his room. He headed for the living room and popped the tape into the VCR. He sat down on the couch as he turned on the TV.   
  
The image that he saw was unexpected. It was of a woman with dark brown hair, deep brown eyes and in a holster she had a Colt Single Action Army. The woman looked at the camera then said; "This video is intended for my son Alexander. Honey, I'm sorry I haven't written you in five years but I've been busy."  
  
"Busy looking for treasure mom" Xander muttered. This didn't make sense. What did his mom have to do with his 'wife?' he thought not paying attention to the flavor text.  
  
"…I came across a unique group of individuals, individuals that are in reality the Olympian Gods. The only problem was that by climbing their home I committed a great sacrilege. The penalty was death Alex, but before I was to be executed the Leader of the Gods saw your photograph and we came to a compromise."   
  
'Gods?' he thought. 'Oh boy. Mom's finally cracked. Gods don't exist.' Xander was now starting to lose interest but once his mom mentioned compromise he paid attention.  
  
"If you ask me Alex the request was, well unique. I agreed to betroth you to the Leader's youngest daughter Glory in exchange for my life. Glory is the Goddess of Harmony and for some reason has been very depressed lately. I have no idea why but when her father saw your picture he felt that you were just what Glory needed to be brought out of her state."  
  
Xander was at loss for words. He couldn't believe what he had just heard. First his mother walked out on him, leaving him to his abusive father when he was only seven and now she just made a deal using him as a bargaining chip!  
  
"Alex, I believe that Glory is what you need. Her father told me that you have suffered a lot but he refuses to tell me exactly what. Your kind heart is what Glory needs and her love is what you need. Please take care of her Alex." Xander then saw his mom wink at him "Don't rush it either. I'm in no hurry to be a grandmother yet." The tape then ended and Xander shut off the VCR and the TV while ranting. How could his mom have done this to him? Picking himself off the couch he stormed down the hall to his room while muttering "Couldn't she have just sent me a postcard instead?"  
  
He entered his room and grabbed her purse with one hand and was about to try and wake her up and show her the door when she giggled about something as she slept. Curious Xander listened in and heard her say in a happy voice "You like it? I made it especially for you."  
  
'What am I doing?' he thought. 'I can't just kick her out. It's something my old man would do.' He just continued to look at the beautiful girl his mother claimed was a goddess. Well she looked like one but being a real goddess? 'I know I'm gonna regret this but it wouldn't hurt if she stayed just tonight.' Putting Glory's purse down Xander quietly left his room. 'Might as well take the guest room.'  
  
Note: How do you like it so far? Keep in mind that there are no vampires, demons, or Slayers in this world. I doubt I will be able to update this soon since I am going on vacation and believe me after working N-Sync I need the rest. 


	4. Love Me

It was a nice Thursday afternoon at Sunnydale High School as three friends talked about the usual things on a guy's mind. Girls and sex. Well actually two of the three friends were. All wore a school uniform consisting of blue pants and either a white or gray shirt. Uniforms were not really popular at the school but after the violent school shootings that had sprung up around the country, the students had no choice. Two of the friends were dark haired while the third was blonde who lit up a cigarette.   
  
"Man let me tell you. Drusilla is strange. She may be good looking but her idea of a date was going to the library and reading about astronomy. I'm telling you boys smart girls are the easiest to get a date with but the hardest to get action from."  
  
"Well Spike I say better Drusilla than Harmony. All we did was go to the mall where all she did was shop. She's also a sadist."  
  
"Harmony Kendall a sadist?! I think you're exaggerating Jesse."  
  
"Hell no. There's a reason why she's called the Harmful Date. Rather then being her date I was in actuality her serving boy, just carrying her goods as she walked in front of me in that miniskirt shaking her ass."  
  
"What did I tell ya Jesse? Women are beautiful to look at but a pain in the ass once you get to know them."  
  
"This coming from the guy who told us 'I'm the luckiest guy in the world to have Buffy as my girlfriend. She's perfect.'  
  
"Yeah Xan, you sure have great talent in being able to find the one for you" Spike responded snidely.  
  
"Maybe the next one won't say what a great guy you are while she sticks a knife in your back" Jesse said laughing.  
  
"Laugh it up guys but at least I've gone out on more then one date with the same girl while you guys can't even get your date to ask you for a good night kiss." Xander then walked away from his friends and started to head back to class.   
  
On the way back to economics he saw Willow and Oz holding each other's hands as they gazed at each other, their eyes full of love. For a moment their faces changed and he saw himself with Buffy in the same position before her betrayal. Disgusted he turned around and headed for class while still thinking on how he was going to get rid of Glory, thinking back earlier.  
  
When he had woken up the next morning she was still unconscious and murmuring; he was able to make out her saying how they were going to be happy. Xander felt that he needed to get her out of the clouds now but he just didn't have the time. If he was late one more time he'd get Saturday School and Saturday's were made to sleep in for. He quickly got dressed for school, skipping breakfast as he tried to come up with a way to get rid of Glory.  
  
His original plan called for him setting her up with either Spike or Jesse. Those two were so desperate for a girl that they would practically pay him to date her. But Xander then came to his senses, realizing that was the worst thing he could do to Glory. It wasn't her fault his mom sold him out or that the supposed 'goddess' was so full of love. He decided that it was best if he talked to her. Now if he could just get through economics.  
  
~*~*~*   
  
Arriving at his house Xander paused at the door, thinking on how he was going to resolve the mess he was in. The truth was that this was all happening way too fast. Course the problem was telling it to her in a way that wouldn't hurt her. He hated seeing a girl cry. As he opened the front door he heard a very cheerful voice yell out "Hi Honey" just before he was hugged by a very beautiful blonde haired girl, nearly knocking them both down.   
  
As she hugged Xander like a lost love (considering she hadn't seen him since last night) she rested her head on his chest as she sighed dreamingly. He didn't know why but for some reason it felt right. Then he remembered that he was supposed to be trying to get rid of her. Recovering his senses he noticed his dad and plastered step-mom smiling at him.   
  
Something strange was going on. His parents never smiled at him.  
  
Motioning for his step-mom to join him, his dad then got close enough to Xander where he then whispered to him "Gotta hand it to you boy, snagging this rich girl. Don't mess it up."   
  
Xander's step-mom then said to the new couple "We'll leave you two alone so you can get to know each other better" then she left the house with her drinking partner to prematurely celebrate the new income they were sure to get from their son's new bride. Glory on the other hand waved goodbye to them with a real happy face.   
  
"What are you so happy about?" Xander wondered.  
  
"Well now we're finally alone."  
  
"And that is a good thing because?"   
  
"My mother told me that the first thing you do when you get married is that you consummate the marriage by engaging in the physical act of love."  
  
Alarm bells rang in Xander's head as he froze.  
  
"What's wrong Alexander?" Glory asked, concern on her face.   
  
"We need to talk and we need to talk NOW" he announced grabbing Glory's hand and he dragged her into the house and down the hall and into his room.   
  
He sat her down on his bed then he started to pace back and forth thinking on how he was going to tell her to leave without hurting her while trying to ignore the feeling of her hand in his.   
  
Glory just looked at the man she loved wondering if this was how the act of making love started. Xander finally stopped pacing and turned around, facing Glory. "Uh, Glory..."  
  
"Oh wait," she said as if gasping for air as she rose from his bed, "say that again!"  
  
"Say what again?" Xander asked.  
  
With a large smile on her face the loving blonde tackled Xander to the floor while saying excitedly "You said my name for the first time. Oh you do love me. My dear sweet Alexander."  
  
Like some men, Alexander Harris panicked at the word 'love.' "Whoa whoa whoa" he cried out breaking free from her hug and getting up from the floor. "First thing, please call me Xander. The second thing, how can I have fallen in love with you? I don't even know you."   
  
Glory's carefree demeanor turned into hurt. She lowered her head down, facing the floor. Her mother never told her about this reaction. He seemed to be somewhat scared. 'Of course' she thought raising her head again. Her father had told her about the pain that had been inflicted on him. The pain she felt that radiated from his photograph. He didn't want to be hurt. 'I could never hurt you darling' she thought.  
  
"Listen Glory" Xander started. "The last thing I want is for this…this…thing to get out of hand and wind up hurting the both of us. Believe me I should know. Besides, 'making love' is something that should be done between two people who love each other and I don't love you."  
  
This wasn't working out quite how Glory pictured it. She was getting confused. Why was he being difficult? "Ah" she said opening her eyes. It was so obvious. "You're nervous like me as well."  
  
"Nervous?" Xander said puzzled. "Nervous about what?"  
  
"You've never made love before" she said excitedly. "Neither have I, but my mother told me how to do it" she added believing that would solve the problem.   
  
"Really" Xander said a little nervously "and just who is your mother?"  
  
"Aphrodite, the Goddess of Love and Queen of the Gods."  
  
'Now I've heard everything' Xander thought. His mother had discovered a lost nut farm. "And I take it that your father is Zeus right?" he said skeptically.  
  
"He's my grandpa. My father is Hercules. The God of Valor and King of the Gods."  
  
Yup, his mom had found a nut farm.  
  
Glory reached with her open arms toward her husband. "So now that we know each other, love me," she asked, already dreaming of his arms around her.  
  
"How many times do I have to tell you? I don't love you. Besides you're not my type."  
  
That last bit was the final nail in the coffin for Glory. "Not your type?" she screamed out loud not believing that he had said that. Angrily she said, "My father wouldn't have allowed you to marry me if you weren't my type." As she said that Xander's room began to shake.  
  
"Me marry you?" he said incredulously. "You're the one who married me. Besides you call kissing me and declaring us married a ceremony?"  
  
The vibrations began to intensify and Xander saw that Glory's eyes began to glow yellow.  
  
"It was in the name of my mother so it was valid."  
  
"Then who do we talk to for a divorce?" Xander snapped.  
  
Glory couldn't take it anymore. So she just let out her rage. Everything that wasn't nailed down flew off their spot, smashing and piling up everywhere making Xander's room looked as though it had been in World War II.  
  
Emerging from underneath a pile of clothes and Batman comics Xander looked at the girl who claimed to be his wife who was panting in the middle of the 'blast point.' What the Hell had happened? Probably an earthquake, or was it? She couldn't have been a goddess. But then again look at his room, and those eyes. He took a quick glance outside the hall and saw everything else in order. Okay so maybe she really was a goddess. He was in trouble if what he remembered about the Olympian Gods were true.  
  
"Look Glory" he said a little scared to the girl who still panted. "I've tried talking to you but that didn't work. So I'm the one that's gonna leave since you won't" he said turning around to leave and walking out of the house, leaving a heartbroken Goddess.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
As he spent the night at Jesse's house, Xander's brain kept rewinding the conversation he had with her, the words 'Oh you do love me. My dear sweet Alexander' still ringing fresh in his mind. He just couldn't do it. He didn't want to get involved with her. The last thing he wanted was for both of them to get hurt and if she really were a goddess, he would be in serious trouble with her parents if he hurt her when the relationship broke apart and of course he would be blamed for everything. Better to stop the digging before you found nothing. Part of him actually felt real bad for Glory but it was for their own good. Even though it had been over five hours since the argument he couldn't put it out of his mind, and therefore he had a very hard time falling asleep.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
Glory put the finishing touches to her husband's room as she fixed it. Following him walking out on her she broke down crying in his room for over an hour. During that time she began to have her doubts about her Alexander. Her father said that he would love her but all he had done so far was become the first being in existence to make her angry. Not even the God of Strife was able to do that. Maybe her father had been wrong about him. Looking at the picture of her Alexander she was ready to go back home when she remembered what her Darling's mother had told her. He may put up a fight about the marriage. But he would eventually cave in to it as well. Glory's hopes and dreams returned as she saw her and her husband together again.  



	5. You WHAT?!?!

Xander was very tired as a result of not being able to get adequate sleep as a result of his argument with Glory. He was doing what he could to stay awake for his English class. He sat down at a desk between Jesse and Spike and in front of Willow and Oz where he lowered his head towards the desk to catch some sleep but before he could meet the Sandman he heard a familiar voice.   
  
"Hi, Alexander!"   
  
"Huh?" he said, looking up and he saw Glory waving at him from the front of the class, as the entire class was looking at him.  
  
"Hi sweetie!"   
  
He began to sweat as he saw the Goddess wondering what she was doing here. Then she started running at him with her arms wide open. "Oh no! NOT HERE" he yelled out loud while getting up from his seat.   
  
But it was too late as the overaffectionate girl jumped at him. Xander instinctively raised up his arms to catch her but Glory had something else entirely in mind.   
  
The separation was more then she could bear so instead of being caught and carried by her husband like a new bride she instead embraced wrapped her arms and legs around her husband as he caught her, giving him a kiss on his lips. However her momentum resulted in them both being knocked down onto the floor in a very provocative position. The entire class began to whistle and howl at the two of them. Blushing bright red Xander quickly got up and held his hand out to Glory while doing his best not to yell at her. He didn't want to repeat Hurricane Goddess in the classroom. "What the HELL are you doing here?" he said as he picked her off the floor. He then noticed that Willow and Oz had just appeared right behind her, their faces radiating the same question. 'What was going on?'  
  
Glory's response to her husband was a cheerful "I want to be around when you cave in" as she started dusting off her uniform.   
  
"Why can't I understand anything girls say?" Xander muttered. Then noticed what she was wearing. "AHHH. Where did you get that school uniform??!!"   
  
Glory held up the knee length skirt showing off her long, divine legs saying, "Your Step-mom took me shopping and..."   
  
Xander stopped listening as he slapped his forehead and said to himself, "What did I do to deserve this?"   
  
Xander then heard Spike say from behind him "Somebody has been keeping a secret" shoving Oz out of the way as he moved next to his friend.   
  
"Introduce us to your chick," Jesse said while shoving Willow to the other side.   
  
"Lover boy." The two teased as they approached them, but Xander just glared at them and they shut up.   
  
"Who's your new friend Xan" Willow asked curiously, never taking her eyes off the blonde who just smiled at her. Xander turn around to face Willow when the new girl wrapped both of her arms around Xander, clinging to him. Her friend looked mad but before he could say anything else to her the new girl said "Hi, my name is Glory and Alexander and I got married the other day."   
  
Willow and the entire classroom fell deathly silent upon hearing those words. The only sound heard was that of the clock ticking and a pencil rolling off a desk.  
  
Then Spike said, "Can I date your wife?" The rest of the class began to gossip about this unbelievable occurrence. It was well known that ever since Buffy dumped him Xander wasn't really crazy about the opposite sex. But this was a new revelation. Xander of all people getting married!   
  
"You're crazy Xan. Getting married but then again she is a hot chick" Jesse said.   
  
Before Xander could verbally defend himself he felt a large whack on his head.   
  
"OUCH. That hurt Willow."   
  
"What the HELL were you THINKING? Getting married! Of all the stupid, irresponsible...what in the world?"  
  
Xander turned around and saw Glory's eyes start to glow yellow. "Oh no" he said to himself, realizing what was going to happen. He quickly grabbed Glory's hand and ran out of the door pulling Glory outside the classroom and leaving everyone else baffled.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
Xander kept running down the hallway and exited the building still holding onto Glory's hand. Coming to a stop Xander turned around to look at Glory who was bewildered with his behavior right now. "Just what did you think you were doing?" he asked her.  
  
"I'm not going to let anybody hurt you Darling. She hurt you and called you stupid."  
  
Xander slapped himself in the head. Trouble was already brewing at it wasn't even 8 am yet. "Okay listen to me Glory. Willow didn't really mean it. She's my best friend and I've known her for a while. She's always doing that to me whenever I do something wrong. Just think of her as a sister who's always looking out for me."  
  
"But she shouldn't really hurt you and besides us getting married wasn't a wrong thing."  
  
"She doesn't hit me that hard. But what I want to know is why are you still here? I thought I told you that I don't love you."  
  
"That's what you say but I know you do."  
  
'Well she is tenacious' Xander thought. He decided to try a different approach. "Look Glory, I'm not the best husband for you. I mean you're a Goddess, I'm a human. In other words, I'm mortal."   
  
"That doesn't really matter Darling. All that matters to me is who you are and that you have a kind heart" she responded smiling, believing that he was caving in.   
  
"So you say but now that we're married how will I support you? I mean, I'm still in school."  
  
"So am I. Don't worry Alexander, we'll be all right."  
  
"Then there's that 'I'm a Goddess' thing. Don't you feel that you deserve better then me?"  
  
"I don't think so," Glory said as she wrapped her arms around Xander's neck and drew him in for a kiss. His mother was right. He would cave in and acknowledge the marriage. "If you didn't have a kind heart my father wouldn't have chosen you to be my husband."  
  
"But why me? I'm nothing special."  
  
"Yes you are. When I was active on this planet, the people actually cared about peace. It didn't matter how ugly things got; they still maintained a positive outlook towards life. But then the God of Strife got involved. He destroyed everything I had done. That's why I was in a depressed mood. I had lost faith in mankind, until you appeared in my life."   
  
"What do you mean by that?"   
  
"When my father came to me, he gave me your picture and when I felt it, I realized I was wrong. You have something no one else here has. Despite whatever pain you have suffered Alexander, you still remain a good person, despite your rough exterior. It shows that not everything I did is gone. My father said that we would make each other happy and after feeling your picture I know I'll be happy with you. Please Alexander, just give me a chance to make you happy."  
  
"Glory" he said, stuttering. "I can't force you away but you're right. No matter how much I'm against this 'marriage' I should give you a chance."  
  
"But Alexander, why are you against our marriage?"  
  
"I don't want us getting hurt and then having real bad feelings toward each other."  
  
"See what I mean Alexander? You have a good heart, being concerned for my well being."  
  
"Another thing Glory. Please don't call me Alexander. I prefer Xander, or Alex if you have to."  
  
Note: Finally got that chapter done so let me know what you think. 


	6. Girl Talk

The Goddess of Harmony was torn as she saw her poor, exhausted husband sleep and it was only seven in the evening. She wasn't really sure on what to do. Part of her wanted to spend some time getting to know him as he said, even though she already knew him from touching him and his photo. But she didn't want to disturb the poor dear. Besides he looked absolutely adorable sleeping. He just looked so peaceful, no trace of pain or sadness emanating from him. There were actually some traces of happiness in him and to her joy, some of it was directed towards her and most especially her cooking. It was the least she could do after all the work he did around the house and the expression on his face when he saw her Italian was priceless.   
  
But the crowning jewel was when he complimented her cooking which caused her to smile at him with eyes full of love. He didn't love her indeed as he claimed but as she stated, his actions told her something else. As a goddess she could have easily had the food materialize from out of nowhere but that was one thing she wasn't going to do. If she was going to have her Alex grow to love her, it would be without using her powers. As a Goddess, she could easily influence his emotions and force him to fall in love with her but as she had heard from her mother's early experiences, Alex would just be a mindless slave. She wanted him to love her for who she was. Not because she was a Goddess so she decided that one way she could win his affections is by helping him, despite his vehement objections to her doing so. It was just so sweet of him. Believing that a Goddess shouldn't do menial jobs. But she wanted to help him. He had already done everything except for the dishes. She figured that she should at least do the dishes. She didn't want him to overexert himself so in doing something like this she could overlook.  
  
She held her hands together and closed her eyes and there was a flash of light. Opening her eyes, Glory saw that all the dishes were clean. Beaming with pride Glory made her way to the living room and used her abilities to clean it up. That done it was then that she noticed something that caught her eye. It was videotape, just like the one her husband's mother had sent with her intended for him. She picked it up and read the label. "Alexander's First Birthday." She excitedly pulled the video out of its sleeve, turned on the TV and video player and began to watch her husband as a little child. She was in for real treat.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
Willow was trying to finish reading Jonathan Swift's "Modest Proposal" but she couldn't keep her mind on her work, even though she didn't have school for two whole days. Her mind kept drifting back to the new girl and what she said.   
  
"Hi, my name is Glory and Alexander and I got married the other day."  
  
She still couldn't believe that Xander had gone and done that without telling her. She knew that he wasn't feeling well but this…this wasn't the answer. Especially after he seemed to have sworn off being interested in the opposite sex to prevent from being hurt again. It was then that she heard a knock on her door bringing her back to reality.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Willow, you have someone to see you" her mother said.  
  
"Any idea who?" she said.  
  
"No. But your visitor asked for you."  
  
Curious, Willow let her room and went down the stairs into the living room where she saw Glory.  
  
"What are you doing here?" she said, half annoyed half-curious.  
  
Smiling while raising a hand Glory happily said "Hi Willow, let's be friends."  
  
"Huh?" 'First she wants to fight with me and now she wants to be friends, at nine twelve in the evening. What's going on?' Willow thought while looking at her watch.  
  
"Okay, what's the gag" Willow said in a demanding voice.  
  
"What's the gag?" she responded, "there is no gag. Alex told me that he thinks of you as a sister who's always looking out for him. You just thought that he did a foolish thing but he didn't. I also want to apologize to you for overreacting. I thought you were trying to hurt my husband so I was defending him. I now know you didn't really mean to hurt him."  
  
Easing off from the Anti-Glory button in her head, Willow said, "Me hurt Xander? I could never do that. I just need to pound some sense into him every now and then but you shouldn't really worry about me hurting him. You're the one that shouldn't hurt him though. His last girlfriend really hurt him. That's the reason why he sometimes acts the way he does. So if you hurt him in any way…"  
  
"It won't happen. He doesn't deserve to be hurt anymore."  
  
"Make sure you don't or you'll be answering to me. But the one thing I don't get is the two of you pulling a Dharma and Greg."  
  
"Who are they" Glory asked.   
  
"Never mind" Willow said. "But I'll consider you a friend as long as you don't hurt Xander."  
  
"So now that we're friends, there's some things I've been meaning to ask you. Things I'm not really comfortable asking Alex."  
  
"Okay" Willow says.  
  
"Should I wear lacy or latex clothing when I try to get Alex to make love to me?"  
  
"Huh?" Willow said caught completely by surprise.  
  
"Also" Glory continued, "should I be moaning and screaming out obscenities while we make love? Oh, and is it appropriate for two women to 'go down' as they said?"  
  
Willow's eyes opened wide at the last bit but found herself unable to respond.  
  
"Do those things hurt?"  
  
"What things hurt?" Willow finally said, not thinking what she may have unleashed.  
  
"Those strap on things the girls used."  
  
"WHAT!?!" she responded, already seeing images of Jessica Alba and Amy Acker together, then trying to blot those out. What was she thinking?  
  
"Is it also alright for two women to share a man? Cause if it is, maybe you wouldn't mind joining me and Alex."  
  
"Glory" she said finding the nerve to speak again, "the idea of sharing a guy doesn't really hold well with many girls. Unless they're real easy like Aura."  
  
"Oh. You said that girl Aura was easy? What does that mean?" she said confused.  
  
"It means that she'll have sex with anyone" Willow said once again acting without thinking.  
  
"Oh! Do you think she'd help me to please Alex if you don't want to perform?" she said excitedly.  
  
"That's not what I meant," Willow said shaking her head while trying to block out another image. This one with her, Oz, and Penelope Cruz… She was gonna hurt Xander for bringing this upon her.  
  
"Willow, how long should I massage him?" Glory said curiously.  
  
"Well that depends on how you massage him," Willow said relieved at the way the conversation was finally changing direction.  
  
"Okay, how long should I use my mouth to massage his…" but Glory was not able to finish her question as she found her new friend's hands cover her mouth.  
  
"I think I've heard MORE than enough Glory. Where did you find this stuff?" Willow said, real mad now.  
  
"Well I was helping Alex clean the house and I found a video tape that was supposed to be about his birthday. His parents must have labeled it wrong because it turned out to be an instructional tape on how to make love."  
  
'There were only two explanations for this' Willow thought. One was that Xander was starting a porno collection or that his own parents..well she couldn't really consider them his parents had taped over his birthday with porn. She knew it was the latter cause Xander wouldn't be stupid to put it in plain site. Besides, porno was expensive. She suddenly found herself actually comfortable with this marriage. Maybe Xander would come out of his shell and actually live a little. He was lucky to have Glory as his wife, even if she did seem pretty naïve. Suddenly an idea formed in her head. The perfect way to get back at Xander for those images. "Glory" she said smiling, "I have a great way for you and Xan to make love." Unfortunately, no one in existence saw the horns growing out of her head.  



	7. Dreams come true.

Xander woke up in bed feeling a little light headed. How'd he get here he thought? The last thing he could remember was helping Glory with her Macbeth essay. He placed his hand to his head but realized that wouldn't jog his memory so he decided to go back to sleep. He had just closed his eyes when he felt something being placed on his chest and he heard a giggle. Xander slowly opened his eyes and tilted his head so he could see what was on his chest and saw the Goddess of Harmony smiling at him.   
  
"Good morning Darling" she said, emphasizing the last word. Xander on the other hand panicked and threw himself out of his bed backwards, pulling some of the sheets with him and hitting his head on the floor. Seeing her husband hurt, Glory's smile immediately turned to concern and she got out of the bed to see if he was ok when she noticed her husband's eyes were wide open. She was confused at this new reaction. Humans could be so strange yet interesting at the same time. She looked at the general direction Alex was looking and realized that he was just staring at her breasts. 'He's looking at me' she thought happily, when she was immediately brought out of her thoughts as Xander quickly covered her up with the sheets that had fallen with him.   
  
"What are you doing sleeping next to me?" he yelled out still panicked.   
  
"We're married silly. Besides don't you remember?"   
  
"What happened?"   
  
"Last night you told me that you wanted to make All of my dreams come true" she said excitedly while clutching her hands together.   
  
"WHAT!!?" he exploded. "I don't remember any of that," he said as if pleading it not to be true. With the sheets still covering her, Glory moved towards her husband whom in turn backed away from her. What resulted was Xander moving throughout his room with Glory trying to trap him.   
  
She finally corned him against the closet. Smiling, she moved closer to him, arms wide open and causing the sheets that covered her to drop to the floor, revealing her divine body which was only covered with blue, frilly panties. Xander immediately shut his eyes, willing for Glory to disappear, wishing that her father was overprotective and would have her leave his room.   
  
After a few seconds of nothing happening he opened his eyes just in time to see her jumping at him yelling out "Oh Darling," tackling him to the ground as she began kissing him savagely this time. For some reason he couldn't fathom he began to respond back, snaking an arm behind her back and the other behind her neck, his tongue now dueling with the Goddess that was his wife, and it felt good.   
  
Then she stopped kissing him. "What'd you stop for?" he asked. Glory just grinned at him wickedly (or in her case, trying to grin wickedly considering that she is practically innocent) "Because we need to plan and prepare," she said. "We've only got around 270 days," she said gently placing her right hand on her belly, sighing.   
  
"270 days? 270 days to prepare for what?" he asked.   
  
"The baby that we just created" the Goddess said giving him the biggest smile he had ever seen.   
  
Xander immediately went on a complete mental shutdown and the image that was stuck in his mind was being sent to the hospital by an infant child with brown/blonde hair and lighting bolts striking at him from the Heavens. The shock of his 'wife's' words were so much for him that he fainted, unaware that Willow was outside his window with a camcorder, rolling on the ground with laughter. She knew that her soon to be ex-best friend was going to kill her, but the expression on his face was worth it, and the threat of releasing it to S.D. High on April Fool's or Valentines Day would probably protect her. Getting back up, she saw Glory looking at her somewhat disappointed.   
  
"Are you sure that this will get Alex to make me moan and shout obscenities?"   
  
"If this doesn't work, I don't know what will. Unless he prefers men."   
  
"He's not like that. Well thanks for helping Willow."   
  
"No problem Glory" Willow said, then she started to grin evilly. "Oh, I just thought of something else you can do to gain Xander's attention."   
  
"REALLY?!?!" Glory said excitedly, eyes wide open.   
  
"In two months, just start crying."   
  
"Crying?"   
  
"Yeah. Give him the full treatment. Tears and sobs, and if you really want to reel him in, put both of your hands to your belly. He'll want to know what's wrong so you tell him that you lost the baby, then really go at the crying. Xander just can not stand to see a girl cry so he'll comfort you and if you play your cards right, he's yours."   
  
"I don't know. Telling him about us making a baby was a lie but telling him another lie wouldn't be good, especially if he starts to cry about it."   
  
"Well, it was just an idea."   
  
"Yeah. Thank you anyway. Bye" she finished waving goodbye to her new friend, and then she went back to trying to wake up her husband when she heard the doorbell rang. The Goddess of Harmony quickly closed her eyes and her school uniform immediately appeared on her. Walking to the door, Glory opened the door and she smiled at the person behind it.   
  
The girl was dressed in latex pants and black leather bra top that matched her black hair.   
  
"Hi ya sis" the dark haired girl said.   
  
"What are you doing here?" Glory said to her sister, glad that she was here.   
  
"I've noticed that you've been having trouble getting the mortal dad picked to be your husband to 'wake up and taste the hottie' so I figure that you need the help from none other then the Goddess of Sex."   
  
"Thank you Faith. You're a good sister."


	8. Sibling Rivalry

When Xander finally regained consciousness, he was nearly beset by another panic attack. Glory was pregnant. He was gonna be dad. This had to be a dream. Yeah, that was it. Otherwise Glory would've been in here waiting for him to awaken, then shower him with more affection then normal. Unless she went shopping for baby stuff…..He really needed to talk to her.  
Getting off the floor, he went to the bathroom and turned on the shower. While waiting for the water to get warm, Xander walked back to his room to get a change of clothes and returned to the shower, where he began to strip down. He entered the shower, and came face to face with a raven-haired girl who smiled at him like he was good enough to eat.  
  
"My my my" she said looking him over, her gaze falling on his crotch. "Daddy must have been mad at me to have chosen Glory over me" she said in admiration.  
  
"AHHHHHHHHHH. How are you? What are you doing here?" he demanded.  
  
"I heard the water running and decided that I really should bathe."  
  
Sputtering, Xander said, "Who are you?"  
  
Eyeing his erect member through the mist, she got down on her knees smiling. "Anyone you want stud."  
  
For some reason, Xander felt himself relax. It was as if he did want this, but he knew he didn't.  
  
"Oh stop fighting me. You know you want it."   
  
Xander then heard a female voice in his head telling him 'no' and 'Glory.' Looking at the mysterious girl he said. "I can't."  
  
"I'm impressed. No one's been able to resist me before. So I know this resistance isn't you." The dark haired girl got up from her knees, and shoved Xander away, slamming him into the bathroom door. The girl then looked around and said, "You can come out twiny. The game's up, I know you're here."  
  
There was no response. "Come on sis. You're the only one who ruins my fun."  
  
Another voice said, "You call trying to get sex with Glory's husband help?"  
  
"Hey, I'm trying to see if he's all 'checked out' for sis. Besides, look at him. Can you say 'Boy toy?' And check out his size."  
  
"Good excuse Faith. I can see it now. 'I've given your mortal a test run and he shouldn't have any problems. By the way sis, can I borrow him when you aren't using him?' Faith, this is one time you shouldn't help, let alone be around our little sister."  
  
"Is that so? Then tell me, what is the Goddess of Lust doing here? This certainly wasn't a social call."  
  
From out of thin air, another figure appeared. She was only wearing a red translucent dress and had her long brown hair done up. "I'm making sure my twin sister's attempts at help don't backfire."  
  
By now Xander had recovered somewhat and just watched the argument that was starting.  
  
"For your information Cordy, I was trying to help Glory. I want what's best for her. You're not just hear to keep an eye on me either are you?"  
  
"I'm also here to help Glory. She needs to have her mortal want her, desire her. Not do something that will mean the world to her, and possibly be meaningless to him. But then again that's your specialty. Face it. Even though your attempts at help are well meaning, they do more damage then good. Like telling Glory to play along with that red head's idea of a faked pregnancy."  
  
"Like it's my fault she's so infatuated with him that she'll try anything to have him accept the marriage. Besides you do not want to get into a 'Who screwed up the most' argument with me sis."  
  
"Well it wasn't me who gave sis's hippies a bad name by turning it from a children of harmony movement into an oversexed movement"   
  
"I'm not the one that broke up the Beatles with Yoko. Do you know how much work it took Glory to get them where they were?"  
  
"Oh yeah! Well I'm not the one who caused Anne Rice to become obsessed with homosexual vampires!"  
  
"Oh c'mon we both know she'd write that garbage eventually! And while we're at it, let's remember who caused mullets here! 'Oh yeah Vinny, the chicks willl dig that style.' Every prick from Alabama to Texas with a Camero and a copy of Skynyrd wears it!"  
  
"HEY!!! That's not as bad as you trying to make Ron Jeremy 'Sexiest Man Alive?' last year."  
  
"He deserved it!!!"  
  
"Just because he was the best cheap fling you ever had doesn't mean he should have his face plastered on the cover of TIME."  
  
"Better him then Tom Cruise!"  
  
"Well at least Tommy is in better shape, and cuter."  
  
"Who needs Viagra. While we're on the subject of cute guys, explain to me your involvement with N-SYNC and the Backstreet Boys."  
  
"Haven't you ever seen without their shirts?"  
  
"Yeah and I think you really need help. The Goddess of Lust drooling over underage flukes, not a pretty site. "  
  
"And neither was what you did to Melrose Place."  
  
"What I did? What about what you did to 90210?"  
  
"Hey, that show needed characters that could entice sex."   
  
"Just like Jennifer Lopez's blue and green dress. Cordy, that dress is so cheap even I wouldn't wear that."  
  
Xander felt that he had heard enough. Quietly he got up from the floor and left, leaving the the two goddess's to their arguing. He needed to talk to his 'wife' yet again.  
  
Note: Been a while huh? Well let me know what you think. 


End file.
